Due for a Post

I would like to say a few things before I get to the "meat and potatoes" of this post. I would like to thank our neighbors Kiki and Christine for their excellent blogpost last night. Brick made a grievous error in not including them in his post: The Times They Are a Changin. I will reiterate to any follower of this blog that our neighbors at 931 have had an immense influence on this house particularly during tailgate season. One could not ask for better partners in tailgating than the girls next door and their graduation marks a sad day for State St as a whole.

Earlier in the week, BOX was challenged by our close friends that live in DKE's State St. House to a handle race. The competition occurred last night. The rules consisted of the following:

1. Both teams drink OLD CROW Bourbon
2. 5 people on a team.
3. Everyone on the team must drink the same amount of booze as the others in the same style. For example, 2 people cannot do shots while the other 3 have mixed drinks. If mixed drinks or pulls are to be utilized the same amount of alcohol must be drank be each person to the discretion of a designated referee.
4. Regardless of the speed at which the individual finishes his drink, he cannot take more alcohol until the last person on his team finishes his drink. One is only as fast as his weakest link.
5. The only time a member of a team is disqualified is if he spills or no longer remains conscious. A team can proceed with up to 2 disqualified members, but if only 2 team members are able to compete than the entire team forfeits.
6. Each team must wear uniforms.

Our team was composed of yours truly, Brick, the Friendly Neighborhood Drunk, Lenders and the Elder Lenders. The scene at about 8:40pm last night begins with Brick hugging a toilet, nursing a violent hangover. He has vomited consistently for the past 20 minutes with game time only a precious few moments away. Needless to say, his excitement to partake in the Handle Race is less than considerable. The Friendly Neighborhood Drink is 15 beers deep already, but his outrageous tolerance and appetite for drunkenness makes him look more sober than me and I've drunk nothing all day. Lenders and the Elder Lenders are notorious drinkers and both have a slight buzz on, but there were suspicions about how the Elder Lenders would perform considering his worried demeanor since he had heard of the competition. Everyone on our team is wearing jerseys and absurd outfits.

DKE walks in wearing neon yellow hats with flat brims, polos, sunglasses and Olympic Gold Medals around their necks. I know at this point that their uniforms mean war. Promptly at 8:55pm EST an epic race begins as both teams pour mixed drinks and drink theirs down as fast as possible. The Friendly Neighborhood Drunk drinks his concoction in less than 5 seconds, but as the rule states he must wait until the last person on our team finishes his drink before he makes another. Meanwhile, Brick is still in the bathroom and vomits for his last time. He picks up his drink, eyes still watering, stifling a boot and he begins to consume his beverage. 22 minutes later at 9:17pm EST, BOX finished their handle and defeated DKE's warriors.