Autumn Fast Approacheth

As we settle into the dog days of summer, it seems as if every day drags on longer and longer as my mind longs for the upcoming fall and all of the greatness that accompanies a new school year. At the same time, it seems as if it were only yesterday that Zola's blogpost detailing the "Most Anticipated Events of Summer" was published. Yet another college summer (my last) has passed by in the blink of an eye, August will be here in a couple of days, and the beginning of classes and football season is just a stones throw away. For me, it was a rather mild summer in terms of alcohol consumption and tomfoolery. But I guess any summer is hard to compare to last summer - when I had no responsibilities and drank nearly every night. But I would argue that a mild summer means good things are to come. Liver's should be rested and funds should be replenished for many, meaning that one will be that much more prepared for an onslaught of booze-inspired poor decision making this fall. And certainly, since the year will be many BOX members' last one in college, we will be prepared to make an appropriate exit from the undergraduate stage of our lives.

In homage to Zola's "Most Anticipated Events of Summer," which again, seems like yesterday, I have comprised a short-list of some big things that will all be happening within the next few weeks. It's a hell of a list we have to look forward to and uncork a new year with:

1. Aug. 13: The Old Crow Challenge (II). Last year, a fledgling tradition was born when three members of BOX embarked on a mission to finish 4(.5) gallons of bourbon whiskey in as many nights. Ever since the end of the challenge last August, BOX members have been yearning for this event like kids waiting for Christmas.

Unlike last year, there is no predetermined goal in mind. However, the general idea is that one should push the limit as to how much bourbon he can drink, and I truly mean push the limit as to how much one's body can physically take. Over the course of 4 days, a man is expected to spend very little time sober, as all of the guidelines of a bender pertain to this event. The hard-core participants will sleep very little, get excessively drunk twice in a day, and probably take a year or so off of their lives. Personally, I'm setting a bar for myself at 2 half gallons, which roughly comes out to a fifth a day... but we'll probably just see where it goes from there. I'm confident that the Friendly Neighborhood Drunk could probably polish off 3 handles in the four day timeslot.

2. Welcome Week(s). BOX members historically have taken the traditional college "welcome week" and turned it into a "welcome month". I remember last fall NotoriousPLC and I had a calendar and one day woke up to realize we had drank something like 17 days in a row; the winter semester ended up being like 30 out of 33 nights in a row drunk. Obviously the traditional welcome week is great for all of the parties, but somehow the drunkenness seems to keep playing out long after most students have settled into reality. As a general rule, I think most BOX members tend to live in a drunken haze until the last possible moment before something significant is actually due for classes. I expect this year to be no different, as many of us are seniors, and now can drink at the bars instead of by ourselves on those lonely Monday nights when everyone else on campus has started studying and you start feeling like a real alcoholic. Additionally, with a new group of drunks living right next door to us, and drunken DKE friends living 2 doors down, it certainly won't be hard to find someone to drink with this year, although most of us have proven that drinking by our lonesome is no strange occurrence.

3. (obviously) Tailgate season. If I was asked to paint a picture of my ideal heaven, it would be almost identical to Ann Arbor on a fall Saturday morning. Waking up at the crack of dawn to a glass of bourbon, drunken tailgates, thousands of maize-clad people walking by, the Wolverines running out of the tunnel at the Big House. I can honestly say that each and every football Saturday I've experienced in college will go down as one of the best days of my life. Ever. Nothing in the world compares to it. When I think about how much money I've spent to go here, and wonder how much I could've saved by going somewhere shittier, I think about football Saturday's. I would pay full tuition for the memories of football Saturday's alone. Hands down.

It really seems like only last fall that I was a freshman walking down State Street for my first game. As I went from frat to frat, and on to the stadium, I realized that my two favorite things in the world - Binge drinking and Michigan football - had been mixed to create an unrivaled atmosphere. Somehow, three years have come and gone in the blink of an eye, and I'm left with only one season left of these heavenly days. Let's make a few more memories, because I know in a couple of years we'll all be longing for these days... if we can remember any of it.