BOX Parties/ Summertime Blues

As May is now rolling into June, and the summer continues to progress, things tend to slow down in Ann Arbor, as many people head home for the summer months. One of those departing is yours truly -- as I will be off to Chicago to try and fight the good fight of the working man for a brief while. Not only this, but several BOX associates, including two men who bravely lived at BOX for two years, will permanently leave us for the real world. So for those of us that will be forced to endure far too long a period without the bliss of drinking ourselves silly at BOX, and even for those of you chronsnakes fortunate enough to be there, I leave you with some of the greatest memories I have of my experiences at BOX parties. Hopefully these memories can get you through the summer months, until we are once again able to blackout together at the piece of crap shack that we call home.

Also, I ranked these parties on a scale of 1-5 Old Crow's (5 being the most blackout-est party), because I have nothing better to do with my life anymore.

5. 2008 Red Wings Stanley Cup. This wasn't actually a party, per se, but it was still one of my favorite nights at BOX ever. We actually did have a party for Game 5 of the '08 Cup, and everyone was ready to celebrate in the closing minutes, but Dave stupidly went out and bought the champagne before the game was over, thus jinxing the Wings and sending the series to Game 6. For game 6 there were considerably less people at the house, but the victory made it a great night. Old Crow and champagne was bought for all to enjoy, we get blackout drunk and ended up spray painting the Stanley Cup in the street on Greenwood. I hope this year ends in the exact same fashion, although I will probably be blacking out by my lonesome in Chicago if this happens.
Blackout meter: 4 out of 5 's

4. Arbor Day Party/Tree in the house It wasn't actually Arbor Day, but we'll just call it that because it resulted in a tree being cut down and put in our house. The day started innocently enough, when a few of us ventured to the Fish to watch a Michigan baseball game. Obviously, we didn't want to pay admission and we wanted to drink, so we set up camp behind the outfield fence and began drinking some 40's there. Not long after we were removed from the premises, we decided to throw a kegger at the house. Shortly thereafter, a fairly large tree was placed in our home, where it remained through the duration of the party (image courtesy of B-Russ' blog):

Blackout meter: 3 out of 5 's

3. BOX Christmas party's. As one of our staple traditions of the house, this party is always one of the best of the year. Before I moved in, the Christmas party was one of my first experiences with the house. My fond memories include Al dressed up in Christmas lights and wreaths exclusively, stocking grab-bags of shots, and enough egg-nog and peppermint patty drinks to make you do things you would regret for a long while. This year was no different, and we even had the band play in the kitchen.
Blackout meter: 5 out of 5 's

2. Ken Griffey Jr. Baseball World Series Party. Last summer I devoted far too much of my time to playing 162 games of this legendary Nintendo 64 game. So when the house's beloved Tigers, led by Ken Griffey Jr's 200 home-run season, made it to the World Series, we held a baseball-themed party. The greatness of this party was made possible by live announcing and national anthem singing by B-Russ on the microphone, champagne spraying by friends clad in Salvation army baseball uniforms, and heavy drinking to celebrate a Tigers victory.
Blackout meter: 4 out of 5 's

1. Tailgate's. If you're reading this, you probably already know the glory that is a BOX tailgate. If you don't know, well, you're missing out on life. Whether it be the heavy metal 5:30 a.m. drinking wake-up, disregarding all traffic by kicking field goals in the street, putting yourself in mortal danger by running through state street during a keg lap, dancing in the yard when the band comes, or any other general behavior that occurs, you simply can't beat a football Saturday. But you know most of this. So I'm going to share a story, which I just learned about actually, that happened during one particular tailgate. Apparently as the blackness settled upon them one fine tailgate morn, both Al and Pete decided that it was "naked hour" for the tailgate. Therefore, they stripped down to their birthday suits and went about their tailgate business while disgusted onlookers were dismayed for an entire 60 minutes. If that's not BOX, then I don't know what is.

Blackout meter: 10 out of 5's

Honorable mention: Party when Brett was so drunk he actually urinated on his lady-friend, in the middle of the party.
Blackout meter: 5 out of 5's

Enjoy your summers' chron-ductors. Drink plenty of Old Crow. Bone some ugly chicks. Make many a bad decision. Let's have many 5 out of 5's parties on the Old Crow scale next year.